Conflict Will Come In Your Marriage
Managing conflict in your marriage begins by understanding that ll marriages will have conflict. If you don’t, either you live on a tropical island with the earnings from your lottery winnings, or you are dead. Either way, it is not possible. Living with another person or persons (children) 24/7 is going to create friction in the form of disagreements, expressed tensions and downright in-your-face arguments without the fisticuffs.
If there is physical or emotional abuse involved, there needs to be an intervention. Don’t let disagreements escalate to the point where there will be physical and emotional scarring.
What we are talking about in this article is the everyday preventative friction caused by having differences of opinion in raising kids, vacations, money, sex life, car maintenance, church, chores, Netflix time, babysitting, sports, cooking, cleaning, mowing the lawn, medicine, or personal hygiene. Issues will occur in spending money on clothes, tools, golf clubs, seeing the in-laws, mortgage, utilities, furniture, tithing, eating out, and health.
Managing Conflict in Your Marriage | 5 Tips
You will have conflict in your marriage. And how you deal with each conflict will determine whether you love your wife for your lifetime, you live miserably for a lifetime, or you end it. Again, don’t let little disagreements become a wedge between you and your wife.
Here are some tips. Conflicts in marriage cannot be solved by ignoring them. Not only will the battle continue under the surface, but emotionally, you have just created a fence that will remain in other areas of your life.
You cannot resolve most conflicts via email, text messages, or twitter comments. Granted, if you forgot to transfer money into the checking account, you can text your wife and tell her with an appropriate apology. But face to face is much better and more complete followed by a meaningful hug and a kiss. A kiss will tell you everything. You cannot kiss your wife if there is still a conflict. Either of you will see through the mandatory peck on the lips.
Apologize for what you did wrong. No matter what the issue or how small your part, be ashamed for that part, which was your fault. Perhaps this will be the first step towards meaningful dialogue.
Initiate the discussion, as this is the man’s responsibility. In my marriage, most conflicts have been resolved by my first beginning the reconciliation process. Man up!
Be relaxed and take each episode seriously. Humor is good provided your wife laughs and thinks it is funny. Humor can cover up emotions, or it can release tension so that thoughts are communicated. Don’t cover up and use good judgment. Humor works for us most of the time.
Pray! Pray first for your arrogance. Don’t let smugness bring you down. Pray for Godly intervention. Pray for wisdom and clarity of thought. Pray for knowing the next steps. Pray for humility. Pray for reconciliation. And, no matter how small the disagreement, pray that your relationship will be restored.
Ephesians 4:15 – “Rather, speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in every way into him who is the head, into Christ.”
About the Author: Paul Veerman
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