How to work on your marriage… “You Get Out What You Put In” just needed a little pizzaz, so we made up a word – YGOWUPI. I’ve seen women spend hundreds of dollars on a shopping spree and jump up and down, trying to get their husband’s attention. The man doesn’t even look up from the newspaper or the newscast long enough to squeeze out the words, “yeah, looks fine.”

Building a healthy marriage? It starts with good habits and intentionality. My dad wore work shoes most of the time. He had a pair of low-top steel-toe shoes that he wore with white socks and pants rolled up, if that paints a picture. He rarely wore dress shoes. Church, funerals, and weddings. That’s it. But he always polished them before he wore them.

Career aspirations and husband duties. Balance. That’s a hard concept. We are taught to work hard. My example started early with both parents. A truck driver and a school librarian didn’t make much.

Financial struggles exist. There are always choices to be made about money in marriage regardless of your age. However, when first married, you quickly learn the value of the dollar. When we were first married, we had two incomes. My wife was a grade-school teacher, and I was a youth pastor. Our combined income paid the bills and allowed us to put some money away for one big item, but the question was, why do we save?

“For all of us have become like one who is unclean, And all our righteous deeds are like a filthy garment; And all of us wither like a leaf, And our iniquities, like the wind, take us away.” — Isaiah 64:6

“He who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the Lord.” — Proverbs 18:22

I was a young man in a serious relationship, having a marriage discussion with my parents. They gave me the most excellent marriage advice I’ve ever heard in my life. I still use it and apply it to this day. They told me to apply the same energy and effort I gave to basketball, writing, games, work, or whatever it is I do with great enthusiasm, into my marriage, and making my wife happy.