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3 Practical Ways You Can Practice Biblical Fatherhood

3 Practical Ways You Can Practice Biblical Fatherhood

As a new father with aspirations of Biblical Fatherhood, I experience the daily joys and blessings of raising a little girl. Although she is not yet a year old, I am growing in my knowledge and understanding of what it means to be a husband and father through God’s word and my local church. The more I read scripture, observe others and reflect upon my own upbringing, it is becoming clearer that fatherhood is no light endeavor. However, too many men settle for less in the name of “providing” while others struggle aimlessly not knowing what the real purpose of Biblical fatherhood is.

Fatherlessness Hurts Biblical Fatherhood

The fatherlessness epidemic which is evident in our country reflects this point precisely. Even secular sociologists lament that “fatherlessness” is the most harmful demographic trend of this generation. To state that there is a deep and painful father wound in multitudes of today’s children is only to state the obvious. Men are not present, whether physically or emotionally, in the lives of their family. So I seek to encourage fathers and father figures to strive in the following areas to honor God and love their children. Moreover, I want to point to three specific areas to consider.

Encouragement

A fundamental aspect of the relationship between a father and his child is in the area of encouragement. Men should seek to inspire, instill confidence, build up hope, and support their children in whatever aims they pursue that are good for them and others. Nothing can be more dejecting than constant criticism or belittling comments that make one feel invaluable or unworthy of their father’s love. Instead, praise your child for what they do right and encourage them as a loving father to do better in areas where they are weak or fail to live up to the standard. As fathers submit to the word of God and discipline children out of love, not anger, only then will they train the child up in the way should go.

“Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged.” Colossians 3:21

Discipline

Legalistic, overly strict commands do not necessarily equal discipline, which is the training up of a child in instruction. It is the primary responsibility of the father, not the mother to discipline the child as the leader of the family. Discipline includes correction and verbal instruction by relying upon biblical principles in the word of God. In this upbringing, fathers should seek to embrace the opportunity to lead and impact their child’s life because it will leave an impression that will last for eternity.

“Fathers …bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.” Ephesians 6:4

Love

Lastly, the most important aspect of fatherhood that encompasses all of the rest is love. A father’s love must be sacrificial, sanctifying, and selfless. When it comes to sacrificing, fathers should see the needs of their child as all-important and seek, by whatever means possible, to meet those needs. Sanctifying love is the service and care for your child’s spiritual well-being. If you truly love your child, you will seek to spend time with them in deep discussion, prayer, and the study of God’s word. And selfless love is the putting on the desires and wants of another. So for example, if you come home from a long day of work and your child eagerly awaits you, then spend some quality time with them. Seek to be an active participant, not just a spectator, in their life and do all that you can to show them the love of God.

“Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.” 1 Corinthians 13:4-7

Wounds Left By The Lack Bibical Fatherhood

Many of you reading this article, know what it is like to live without a dad’s emotional care, support socially, or spiritual guidance. The consequences can be severely devastating and leave wounds that take years to heal. So I am convinced of the fact that Biblical fatherhood is a very high calling, one with great power to bless children or severely wound them.

Our nation is no stranger to the millions of daughters who desperately seek the affection their fathers never gave them. Similarly, there are countless sons who were denied a healthy same-sex relationship with their father and are now spending the rest of their lives in search of their sexual identity via perversion and immorality.

It’s undeniable that we all have wounds from our present challenges with regards to this topic of fatherhood. The depths of this I may never know but I know the One who does. Coming to know God the Father through faith in Jesus Christ has helped me make sense of it all: my deepest wounds and my present inadequacies as a father. Being a Christian with the light of God’s word and fellowship of His people through the local church has helped me deal with these things.

Instruments of God: A Calling for Biblical Fatherhood

Fathers and father figures, you are instruments of God so take not lightly your grand responsibility but embrace the wonderful opportunity to lead, love, and serve those around you whether they be your biological children or not. Even in your shortcomings, continue to make significant strides to encourage, instruct, and build up your family in faith towards Jesus Christ.

Author: Jeweleon Jones is a husband and father. He currently resides in Fuquay-Varina and is a member of Redeemer Community Church. His passion is reaching people from different backgrounds, ethnicities, and situations with the glorious gospel of Jesus Christ.

For more articles on Biblical Fatherhood and setting the example, we recommend:

  1. Fathering Your Children With The Model of Christ
  2. How You Can Serve Your Wife and Your Kids

 

18 Comments

  1. Mark Monnin

    This was so good for me. Thank you for this! I feel like I often fail at disciplining without anger, and this was good encouragement for me.

    Reply
    • Jonathan Hop

      Keep fight the good fight, brother! Stay strong in The Lord??! Know that you are NOT alone…I battle with this too!

      Reply
  2. James Seaux

    Awesome passage

    Reply
  3. Brandon S.

    Much needed!

    Reply
  4. Quincy Alvarez

    This was a great reminder of the impact i have on my child spiritually as she grows up

    Reply
  5. Kevin Burt

    Great article. I highly recommend the book, “Strong Fathers, Strong Daughters” by Meg Meeker, M.D. to understand how important my role was to my daughter joy, happiness and success in life. It was a game-changer and helped me to “grow-up” and assume the role of what God intended a father to be.

    Reply
  6. Heath Bishop

    Thank you! This is truly inspirational.

    Fathers without fathers is at an epidemic now. How do we heal this? How do we reach the fathers without fathers who are at the point where they are thinking “my father left, why can’t I”?

    Reply
    • Tj Todd

      Heath, that is exactly what we said years ago. How do we reach the fathers without fathers. The men without a Godly influence. The man not leading his family. One way you can help is to financially support Uncommen and help us reach more men. With our Uncommen Charters, we try to enable men to grow as a Husband, Dad and Leader. Helping them invest into themselves, their family, other men and their community is how we can change our culture. You can either contact me at admin@uncommen.org or look at our charter packages. 2 Chronicles 7:14If my people who are called by my name humble themselves, and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and heal their land.

      Reply
  7. Kevin Haggerty

    Sad to say, when I read an article such as this, it slices right into my heart with agony. I can’t even imagine growing up in a fairly stable home, as many many people were, and it hurts very deeply. I’ve been in counseling and therapy for several years to finally deal with the trauma I sucked up inside of me from years of abuse growing up. Yes I became a believer when I was about 18, but all of this damage inside which I tried to ignore, hurt the very people I love. I was not that good of a father nor husband, and now I’m dealing with the after effect’s, even though I’ve received help, and am healing inside. Its a terrible place to be when your own children don’t like you and your crying out for love to show and hearts to be mended. Very very hard. It would be nice if things were so easy as stated in this article, as on my end, things are very painful and sad. Please help me Lord Jesus.

    Reply
    • Tj Todd

      Kevin, thank you for sharing your situation. Thankfully when God forgives, he forgives completely. When he looks at you and I, he only sees Jesus. Unfortunately people have a harder time of forgiving. Give yourself and others around you time to see the change. Since you can’t change the past, focus on changing the now. Be a Godly example when you are around others. If you need to say you’re sorry for something you’ve done in the past, today is a great day to rebuild that relationship. You are a new creation in Christ Jesus and people need to see that. I will be praying for you Kevin. Stay Uncommen!

      Reply
      • Kevin Haggerty

        Thank you so much for your words. They are well taken to heart. I know they’re is hope in Jesus , and I have to take one day at a time.

        Reply
      • Kevin Haggerty

        Thank you for the words of hope. I know things take time, and I must rest in Gods forgiveness.

        Reply
  8. Tom

    Good luck, Kevin.

    I love to cover my basics when times are tough. Helpes me alot

    Train
    Eat better
    8 hour sleep every night

    Reply
    • Kevin Haggerty

      Thank you and I appreciate your words. It means a lot.
      God bless.

      Reply
    • Kevin Haggerty

      Thank you for the words of encouragement.

      Reply
  9. CT Jenkins

    Kevin,
    My heart breaks for you. By the grace of God and him only, I was able to be raised in a stable home and now see my son doing all he can to raise his daughters as a Godly father. It has become a mission for me to try and mentor as many young men in our church as I possibly can due to the example left for me. The older I get, the more I realize how perfect God’s plan for us is. And when I reflect on my early life as a husband and father, I see very plainly how forgiving and patient he is. I certainly tried him at every turn. Yet he kept loving and disciplining me until he had my attention. Please do not be discouraged. God’s love is all powerful. Continue to pray for your family that they will see the change in you and you all can begin enjoying family as God intended for it to be. I have prayed for you already this morning Kevin and will continue to do so.” Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.” Joshua 1:9

    Reply
    • Kevin Haggerty

      I praise God for ministries such as this and truly appreciate your words of hope. God bless.

      Reply
  10. Fraction Muzamba

    Very timely article!Thank God for the grace upon you the beloved that He’s using to bring the much needed and desired wisdom to change several of us young men that are struggling to be the father that God intends us to be.Its just on point.

    Reply

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