The Honeymoon’s Over, Real Life Has Begun

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Mark 10:9 “What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.”

Thanks to online streaming services, my wife and I have watched the previous 16 seasons of Law and Order. We have to deal with the torture of waiting a week before new episodes air. We’re obviously spoiled.

Most shows were meant to be watched once a week, drawing over an entire season. Between the other shows and commercials, we’re supposed to hold on to the storyline of a particular character lineup and setting. That’s normal. That’s what’s to be expected. But now, thanks to online services and DVR, a new phenomenon has occurred- binge-watching. You know the practice of closing the blinds in the morning, barely eating or sleeping, turning off the phone for a weekend just to finish your series. We do this because we have a little time off and an opportunity to indulge.

It kind of reminds me of my honeymoon.

It’s not until the blinds are opened, a shower is taken, clothes are changed, people are spoken to, work demands grow, houses become too small, babies keep us up at night, and our wives don’t want to (or can’t) close the doors to everything else, that we find ourselves in the real world. We long for the days when she shut everyone and everything else out, and you started on the couch and ended up in the bed. But now, the couch is no longer a safe place. If you sit there too long, you may find yourself sleeping there, and if you try and go to bed without sleep in mind, you find yourself back on the couch channel surfing instead. So, where did the honeymoon days go?

Real-life is action-packed indeed; it just seems we have forgotten. The beautiful woman needs rescuing from the dangerous abductors that hold her for ransom. The abductors are called children, and the ransom is called feeding them and bathing them. She needs you to not only rescue her but romanticize her. It’s called flowers for an apparent reason, love notes left next to her pillow, coffee made sitting on the nightstand at 6 am, and a Friday night dessert with friends. You called the sitter and negotiated the terms of her release.

Your son wants you to do the army crawl with him while holding army men in the backyard fighting off terrorists. Your daughter wants you to hold her hand while wearing a tiara, escorting her to her chariot as you take her on an ice cream date.

As you can see, this is not for the faint of heart. If anyone asks why you lost your hair, give that person a rundown of your weekly schedule. If they still don’t understand, have them watch your kids while you and your wife have a weekend getaway. They will have a completely different view when you return.

As far as things changing with your wife, take it from a married man of 32 years; it comes back around. Once the empty nest years hit, you can get back to the honeymoon phase anytime you want. You just need to pay your dues while you be the Husband, Dad, and Leader you were always meant to be.

Men, if you didn’t already know it, we pray for you every day.

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