Ecclesiastes 4:10 “For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up!”

I wasn’t fortunate enough to receive guidance and support from my father, but several men in my life had acted as role models by sharing their time, wisdom, and good attitude when I needed it most. Because of them, I am forever grateful for the example they have given me to be a better dad. These men include my grandfather, my uncles, and a mentor. But the one man I probably learned the most from is my father-in-law, Randy.

I never expected that my best friend’s dad would one day become my father-in-law and that I would establish a close relationship with the man I had always heard wonderful stories about from my friend, Josh. I had been a bit jealous then, listening to Josh talking about his trips to visit his parents and invariably a notable story involving his father.

Josh’s experiences were foreign yet mesmerizing to me. Most of the anecdotes that caught my attention were about how he and Randy worked to restore a car or repair a vehicle Josh was having trouble with. No one had ever invited me under the hood like that. I learned some things about car maintenance from my mom but never experienced the bond between a father and son while working together.

A couple of years later, I fell in love with Josh’s sister and Josh’s dad, and I began sharing the intricacies of mechanical repair under the hoods of many cars. Sure, I would still have the embarrassing moments where Randy would ask me to hand him a three-quarter eighth something or other, and I would fumble through his toolbox looking for the correct bit, or lug nut, or ratchet. But despite my clear novice in repairing much of anything besides a computer, my father-in-law began sharing great life lessons. My relationship with Randy made me aware that it doesn’t matter whether it’s your father or your father-in-law.

Mentor / Mentoring

Not everyone will marry into a family with a built-in mentor as a father-in-law. So how do you find a mentor that can help you in different areas of your life? Please don’t tell me you’re one of those guys that think they don’t need a mentor. Every guy needs another guy who understands what it’s like to be a man. You may have a “bro” that you ride or die with and hang out with at times.

But think if that “bro” was a Godly man that had a little more experience in life and could help advise during difficult times. A “bro” or brother in Christ who could pray for you, encourage you, and challenge you when needed.

Now think about how you could mentor someone younger than you and how much that would mean to them. After all the time I spent working on cars with my Father-in-law, it was the advice that was most beneficial. The time we spent together talking about life was some of the best counseling I have ever gotten. It was not out of pride or competitiveness but rather out of concern.

Our scripture verse states, “For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up!” I’m so thankful that Randy was there to lift me.

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