Spiritual growth. For the last few years, I’ve gotten really into coffee. I started buying raw coffee beans about 6 years ago and have been working persistently towards developing the perfect method for roasting. Beyond that, I’m always experimenting with various brewing methods, pour-overs, siphons, espresso… I’ve even been practicing my latte art. It’s one of those hobbies that I do purely for fun, and solely because I enjoy it. I enjoy researching different products, and reading and watching different techniques to roast, grind or brew coffee. And what’s even better, is that my wife fully supports my hobby as she is the beneficiary of some pretty decent coffee.
I’m a research guy… at least as far as it concerns things that I enjoy doing. I’ll Google it, YouTube it, I read reviews, and compare products. If I’m tasked with an upcoming home project or a car repair, I look it up and learn as much as I can about how to do it before I grab a hammer or a wrench and begin the work.
I try to keep a realistic view of my capabilities though! I can usually tell if something is beyond my skill-set, and if so, I’m happy to consult an expert, or will at least partner with somebody else who has experience with that thing.
Ultimately, in these areas, I want to do good work. When I make something or fix something, or whatever the task is, I want to be able to look back on that thing and be proud of the work I’ve done. And I like to learn about how to be better at the things I enjoy doing.
But sometimes, I have to take a look at other things in my life to see if I’m putting as much effort and energy into ‘mastering the craft’ of things that are really important. I’m also a husband, a father, and a Christian… am I as diligent in studying and researching how to be better in these areas as I am with coffee? Not surprisingly, the answer is no.
Think about it… maybe the thing that interests you is sports, or woodwork, or music. How much time do you spend doing or reading about these things? Perhaps you’re in ministry? How much time do you spend preparing a sermon, or planning an outreach or an event? Make no mistake, these are fantastic things to do, and I believe that we are all supposed to do the best we can in every area of our life.
Colossians 3:23 says, “Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men.”
I Corinthians 10:31 says, “…whatever you do, do all to the glory of God.”
I believe that whatever we lend our hand to, it is our responsibility as men and as Christians to do that thing with the highest level of excellence that we can.
But what research have you done to learn about how to be a better communicator with your wife? Or about how to be a more effective parent? Are you putting as much effort into your most critical relationships as you are putting into your hobbies, interests, or ministry?
Maybe there is some repair work that needs to happen in your relationship with your wife or with your kids, and you think that it is beyond your skill-set.
Don’t let that be a reason for you to put off the work that needs to be done… Consult an expert or at least partner with somebody else who has experience!
Your relationships at home should be a testimony to your craftsmanship, and I want for each of you to be proud of the work you’ve done.
Men, husbands, fathers… here’s to becoming masters of our craft! Here’s to spiritual growth!
Author: Dave Lucido
This is my first time commenting on this site, or any really. I’m not a fan of the social media movement. I love the content in UNCOMMEN and thank God that I found it. I will have to admit, I have not been very good at mastering my craft as a husband and father. I’ve been married for 15 years and a father for 14 years. I went through the motions of life and never planned for anything then wondered why we never had the life I wanted to give them. I was never the partner for my wife that she needed. Instead I sat in my self pity and made things worse for her and my family by not stepping up and being a husband and father. I did not do my part to move the family forward. Instead I was acting like a dead weight. It wasn’t till just recently I realized or maybe took responsibility for what I wasn’t doing and asked God to help me. God has always been a part of my life. I just didn’t rely on His teachings as much as I should have. Andy Stanley said in one of his podcast series something to the effect of ‘You have to think of change like resurfacing a car or old piece of furniture. You have to take off the old before you can put on the new or the new won’t stick.’ During the process of taking of the old it gets really messy and the object may look worse than when you started. It will take time, effort and energy to make it new again. But the end product will be much better. I have chosen to trust God with my “resurfacing”. I do not want to be a Jack anymore. Thank you for this site and the work you do. Here’s to being UNCOMMEN!
Dan, I loved your comment. I believe God is going to do amazing things in your life. You will be doing a lot of “this is my first time “. We all need to stop and look at ourselves. I also believe that your wife has been praying for you and God has been patiently waiting on you. My wife prayed for me for years, but we have to see that we need change. We will always need to move forward with changing into what God wants us to be.
God bless you and your family. The best is yet to come!
Thank you Nate for the compliment and the encouragement! I’m ready to fight for God to restore what He has designed for me and trust in Him for literally every need. I can already see little changes happening. I have to keep reminding myself that even though I see small changes happening, I must press on and CHOOSE to keep improving everyday. It’s encouragement from guys like you that help keep me going. ?? We have no idea how encouraging one man could impact him, his family, and the people he may encounter. Thanks Nate!
I’ve slowly began reading some of these articles and when I do I can’t explain how perfect the timing is. I don’t open every UNCOMMEN email but the one I’ve chose to so far have had articles like this that really speak to me. Thank you God for your love, grace, and AMAZING timing when it comes to needing to hear you. Thank you as well to the author for taking time to help us hear our most amazing Lord.
I ha e grown up catholic and went by all the rules and repetitiveness through my teens and drifted away from God and went on my own. By 18 I had my first son and I ended up being a single father with mom not in sight. I still partied and did things I had to do to support me and my son. I met the woman I’m with now by gods grace, he truly has blessed me. She helped me turn around and get focused. I’m now a union industrial painter and a foreman at that. I have found God and asked for his salvation and build our relationship everyday. She is a amazing woman and deserves me and all of me which alot of times I’m there for her and the kids but not present. Finding this site and my heavenly father and all of these stories not to mention his word keeps my heart pure and building my relationship with my wife and kids along with God. I learned how to work so hard to provide for them now it’s about working hard at home to provide a faith and loved filled home not just a beautiful home with emptiness apon it. But all praise has to go to him no matter how hard I work for it all, with out him nothing is possible but through him everything is possible.
Man I must say these articles and comments really hit home for me as well. I don’t know about anyone else but I sometimes feel like no one can truly understand what I go through or have been through and then I read uncommon just because the title in the email caught my eye and bam I start reading and realize I’m not alone. Thank God for men like you all. We may think of it as a little thing but encouragement yields big results. Thanks again and may God bless us all with wisdom and endurance to keep moving forward for His glory.